Thursday, October 30, 2008

okay, how should i start???

hmm, i'm glad tat u finally understand wad love is all abt??? nabila, fiona, claire, karying, dewi, serena, peisi, kenneth, gwyn, fish... look all tis ppl haf lots of link... when i read sth juz now, i was stund, i dun noe wad i should do but i feel like crying, "WHY"??? see 4 urself... i dun noe wad i should do??? but everyday i haf 2 face de same old thing... i dun wan tis thing 2 affect de frenzship between nabila & me... now i understand, love can't be force... now, u haf 2 face de same concept too... face it... maybe tis will be good... dun ask 4 sympathy... no use... wad is done is done... juz dun continue doing de wrong thing... i realise de mistakes though is not completely my fault but still i dun noe wad i should do??? i can't run away from u but i juz felt so miserable... understand me will u... "stupid is wad i can describe about me, i was so stupid"... i really treasure tis frenzship, i dun wan it 2 end okay... beela & fiona, i think u guys noe wad happen 2day rite... "Ham & Cheese Biscuit", wad happen, it was dump into de bin... "why"??? is it intentionally??? i regret 4 dumping u into de bin... i'm sorry... it's too late 2 grab u back... why should i be affected??? why i felt tis way, becuz i care... i love u but in de other way round u dun love me??? love involve both parties... if 1 dun love de other, how can de relationship go on... i think of de things u does, it hurts me... i felt terrible in fact i felt more dirty... believe me or not, u r not in my shoe... i dun noe how 2 say, Traitors, Betrayer??? i'm afraid... i'm very very disappointed??? can someone teach me wad 2 do??? i'm loss...

beela... alot has happen 2 us, i wish i can go into ur mind & read wad's on ur mind... i hope we will stay like tis 4ever??? rmb u once wrote 2 me "we r close gurl okay"... when i saw tis sentence, tears almost drop down by my eyes but i can't let it drop cuz it was in a very high class place... i wish de bond in us will stay like tis 4ever... lala, beela, bearla, elmo... i miss u, seriously sometimes when i saw ur face turn pale, i noe wad u r thinking but i juz kept quiet... i noe how u feel girl & sometimes i felt so hurt when ur vain appears... sec 3, in pula ubin, i saw u... at de jetty before boarding de boat i kept looking at u, wondering will we be frenz later on??? once i reach de jetty, we had 2 walk 2hours be4 we reach de campsite... guess wad, we haf 2 do alot of cheers, when i was cheering, i kept thinking wheather we will be in de same group??? but apparently we r not... but nvm we had fun in our own groups... as day past by, we haf already become NCO... sec 4??? when we haf camp again, (ATC) i was in "leo group" but still can't be in de same group as u... nvm, i juz rmb u & whenever i get 2 bath, i'm happy cuz everyone will bath tgt & i might haf a chance 2 bump into u...

was wondering???
6:00am???
games???
element???
field cooking???
tent pitching???
campfire???
bathing???
lights out???
which activities will i get 2 see u???

but still can't see u... nvm...

during dec last year, i met u... i was happy...

then 1st day 2 ITE... i rmb we were both so scare & we keep hope tat we can be in de same class... Finally we reach sch, when we are walking 2 de auditorum??? we are so panic... when we look at de "Name List", scolling down de index number... i saw (23) Siti Nabila Bte Mohammad... then next i felt scare, i was really hoping tat i can haf a companion juz like u... then guess wad, next i saw (24) Lim Li Jun... I was so happy & we both walk in happily like crazy... rmb we sat next 2 each other, wondering how will our class be like??? all tis memories juz flash down my mind juz now... carry on, when we found our Teacher... "Mr Goh Choon Poh... we find him very nice & funny... then after auditorum, we went 2 class with our CE... then we do alot of things tgt, like, going 2 de toilet, eating, sitting, playing, grouping & now even role play... so many things has happen & we r still grouping tgt... FRENZ??? i really hope tis frenzship won't end... since cherlynn came, we r always seperated, why??? cuz i feel bad when i leave her alone, then when i went wif her, u r left alone??? tat time i really wonder how??? should i cut myself into half??? but all tis has past... after she's gone, we r back??? there was once we had a cold shoulder??? why??? u noe it & i noe it... it's a secret between us... beela, see... so much has happen??? so much, so much, so much... as u say... our frenzship has a story behind & u say u hope tis story won't end rite... i hope it won't end too... nabila, listen, no matter wad happen, i dun wan 2 lose u... hope we will be staying like tis 4ever...

dewi, fiona... thks 4 everything... wow, tat period was such a bad period 4 me, thks for all de patient & thks for tolerating... i dun noe wad's more i can say but really i'm very happy 2 noe u guys... can i juz cry everything out... i really felt very bad... omg, why muz i hate her??? why why why??? why muz i felt tis way??? rmb i always ask WHY & HOW??? i also dun noe why??? dewi, fiona... i rmb there was once at cafe 1... i was standing outside cafe 1 alone & i was very upset... no 1 was there wif me... u noe wad... i saw all of u in cafe 1 eating & talking so happily while i was outside crying feeling so bad... then u guys appear... i went up front 2 call u guys, actually i didn't intend to call u guys cuz i was afraid but i still call u guys in de end... i rmb clearly, i hub u guys, my heart juz sank totally??? it hurt terribly... :( i was very touch at tat moment... then after tat u guys ask me 2 join u guys, i did not agree 2 it, so i went up 2 3rd floor alone... saw sattish, he came & he talk 2 me... from there, i started 2 smile... i rmb everything so clearly, i juz can't get rid of them... dewi, fiona... thks 4 being there...

claire... while swimming, we chat... after chatting each time, i feel tat i'm slowly throwing everything out but rite now, i'm thinking of all de things... omg, i miss de laughing pills... i wan it back... but i dun noe why now i'm feeling terrible... i feel great when i float wif u... wow, i still can rmb de water is so cold... i really admire de thing u do in de water... i dun noe wad is tat but when i saw 2 of de legs up above de water... i felt different... is like watching u dance in de water... seriously, i feel like floating now... claire will u feel better after u done tat in de water... if yes i wan 2 learn, provided i won't get cramp... jk jk... anyway do u feel better after i haf massage 4 u??? sorry if i massage it too harshly... "fruit juice"... tat was ur favourite drink, i guess??? saw u drinking it almost everyday... "BANANA" rmb??? hmm "FATS ar FATS"... sorry i always say tat... but tat was wad i'm most afraid about, i guess everyone is afraid but not as mad as me... so pls dun mind me... sorry... hmm, nonsensical??? i miss everything we does... i hope our frenship will remain & i hope it won't end...

karying thks ar... pls cheer up, dun be sad... juz follow ur heart alrite... wadever decision u make, i will support u... dun cry anymore... crying won't help in fact it will make u go blind... so think carefully when u drop another tears... "think wheather is it worth it"??? dun get stress up, when u feel like crying, juz relax urself & think of de happy memories tat u haf... like tat u will feel better... seriously, i haf been through wad u are facing... trust me, time will prove u everything... in life we will always face prob so dun avoid but face it & solve it... maybe meeting up can solve everything then why not meet up??? think carefully before u make any decision okay... dun worry, i will be there 4 u always k... smilez more... cheer up alrite...

4:39 AM
I Love You

Thursday, October 30, 2008

Welcome!

Craving

loves & hates

tagboard

Links

Memoirs

Credits